Evil German Dude (EGD)
I have talked often of the infamous evil superhero The Ditchfinder. He is also known throughout the civilized world as Evil German Dude. He is in fact, a good friend of mine. He hails from Germany and brings with him a keen (although evil) intellect. He used to own a meticulously taken care of 1986 Mercedes Benz E260. This vehicle sets all the standards for cleanliness and maintenance and is in fact the finest older car I have ever seen. He has a newer one now and once again it is very pretty and exceptionally well cared for. Although it is painted, "an American color". The vehicle that gets most of the comments is the "Ditchfinder". It is so called because one late afternoon the Titanium Hitch was called to extract the 1995 GMC 1500 extended cab, long bed from a ditch it had inadvertantly wandered into. This truck is modified with all the gadgets you could imagine.
Lamps! most Rovers will never have all the lamps this truck has. They are all Hellas (of course). You can remote start the vehicle, and roll the windows up when the vehicle is exited and the alarm is activated. It is not necessary to say that this truck has an impecably maintained interior.
The Ditchfinder is a true evil genius. He has the most amazing tool kit you could imagine. In just 10 minutes he can set up an entire first eschelon maintenance facility in your driveway. I once saw him make a "cherry picker" out of 3 paperclips and a piece of angle iron. We tease him that with just a paper clip, a ball point pen and a piece of cork he could make a working nuclear reactor. He can fix anything and is quite capable under the hood. He helped me with the refitting of a new coil and the wiring of the lights on the front of my Rover to be activated with the now useless EAS buttons on my dash.
The Ditchfinder's evil side kick is Titanium Hitch. Notably famous for an afternoon rescue of The Ditchfinder. Titanium Hitch called on his evil powers and the "titanium hitch" on his 1996 Chevy Blazer in this now famous event. First in his jabs at the Okie Rover (your humble writer) when his truck was in the transmission shop for a new and less wobbly torque converter and accompanying rear seal.
He was awed by my morning rescue of a friend who could not get his newspapers delivered in the big snow and ice storm of 2001. Where I bore my friend and his newspapers safely to their front porches all over Norman. This was only followed by his barbed jabs at the Okie Rover when I failed to arrive at work the following Monday. After two hours of watching 2 wheel drive J**p Cherokees and the other pretender SUVs spin round and round on the ice covered roads we had only reached the halfway mark on our journey. I returned safely to my home and spent the day running errands in the frozen wonderland. Always there for you when you need him and the first to hurl a snide remark against the famous and venerated Solihull name he's a good friend.
Thanks for reading and happy Rovering.